Stoner Food Reviews (Rebaked!), Day 7 - The End

Tonight is the end of the stoner food reviews for a while, probably a great while or indefinitely.  I will end with an intriguing liqueur and one of the best foods in the world: Bombay Grill's Paneer Makhani with rice.

Time to get to "work"…

Listening to: The Who, Metric (early, not late)

CHAMBORD

 

It's a black raspberry liqueur imported from France and it comes in one size at $40 a bottle; expensive but a great mixer.  

Raspberry is obviously the first flavour.  A bit artificial tasting, but that's liqueurs for you.  Mmm…  I always find it too sweet on its own but otherwise it's a very nice raspberry liqueur.  Tastes like candy, classy candy.  That was good.  Now... I can hardly wait.  La piece de resistance.

PANEER MAKHANI

It looks so beautiful with the curved, spiced grains of rice smiling at me.   “Eat me, eat me!” they say.  And I weep, “yes, dreamlings, I will eat you.  I will eat you until the end of time.”  Nice big triangular chunks of paneer.  So excited.  Mmmm... cheesy and spicy and the the soft paneer and rice.  The rice brushes my mouth like a light breeze.  And it has this nice tomato flavour as well.  If this was my food for the rest of my life I wouldn’t be that pissed.  They just do both the rice and curry so nicely.  My one complaint is that the paneer isn’t very flavourful in the middle but the sauce does a good job at distracting from that.  I mostly taste creaminess and tomato to the sauce and a little spiciness.  The rice perhaps has a bit of coriander and possibly cumin seeds.  I don’t know about the rest of the flavours and spices, but they work together like perfection.  Nice and buttery as well.  As I said, one of the best foods in the world.  

I am done.

But the moment I am back we will eat chocolate jesus.

Stoner Food Reviews (Rebaked!), Day 6

Bonjour bollygoggles!

Before I become intoxicated, I would like to say that tomorrow will be the last day of these reviews because a week just seems like a good amount of time to do this seeing as I just wanted to revisit it for fun.  To end off the week, I will get take-out from a magical indian restaurant called Bombay Grill because their Paneer Makhani is one of the greatest dishes I have ever tasted.

Now, time to take care of business...

Listening to: Kid Cudi and other emerald-aimed music.
Watching: 30Rock

Yep, now I'm high.  So, I found the perfect thing to review high.  Fucking...

VANILLA CUPCAKE-FLAVOURED GOLDFISH



So I am starving.  It sucks to wait to eat food, which is one reason I'll be glad this is over tomorrow.  Really looking forward to that curry.  Nom nom nom.  Okay, let's try this.  Savoury and sweet, reminds me of those teddy graham cookies.  Ok, that isn't that weird.  They're basically cookies.  I should have known that seeing as it was in the cookie section, but you kind of assume it's going to be like the crackers and then if it's vanilla cupcake-flavoured then that's a weird food, but it tastes bready and sweet, like a cookie and it has a cookie texture.  Why is eye contact so frightening?  I don't know.  Maybe it's because you are clearly being watched intently.  It tastes artificial but not enough that it's bothersome.  Agh, got really freaked out just remembering this video --  Film Theory quite convincingly alleged that Wall-E has cannibalism.  Shudder.  Now let me continue this nice food review.  This does not taste like vanilla cupcake but instead vanilla teddy grahams.  So tired, so high… It's good.  They'd make a nice sugary work snack.  I'll definitely finish the bag.  Not tonight.  We've got bigger and better things…



SWISS, POTATO CHIP AND SOURDOUGH SANDWICH



This is turning out to be high food combo night, even thought the first one kind of tricked me.  Don't you think Goldfish is tricking stoners?  Thinking they'll be crackers when they're cookies...  Geez.  But you're right, I could have probably thought of some even weirder stoner food combos.

This is a sandwich I just regularly like to make, usually with a white or sourdough baguette.  Almost forgot to think about what I'm tasting haha.  Sour, potato chip taste.  There's a sharpness to the flavour of the bread.  I think I'm not used to savouring sandwiches such as these which is a shame.  I think I eat too fast.  The bread has a good texture, nice and fresh-tasting.  When you really taste all three it's a nice flavour.  I prefer the white bread version however this is also good in its own unique way.  The swiss is the least prominent flavour but you can subtly taste it and it complements the chips and bread.  I also love the texture of chips in a sandwich, crunchy and thin.  Very nice, a lovely lunch that one might consume at some normal place like a bath house or inside a piano or maybe at a microscopic, nah, why can't I think of one that isn't scary?  A lovely lunch to consume at a microscopic level inside a water bottle on a sunny summer morning in Santa Fe.  Ye.  I declare this sandwich quite nice.

BEER

I've chosen Muskoka Cream Ale.  I am too high.  I drank several sips before I remembered that I should be reviewing it.  Very nice.  Piney, sweet.  I'm not super familiar with cream ales and what they're all about.  Lots of hop to it and yet there's a sweetness to the flavour somehow.  It's good but not remarkably interesting.  Maybe I'd pick up more things sober but I'm just getting hammered by the hops of it and the piney-ness.  It says it has floral tones on the bottle.  That makes sense.  English pub style ale is smooth and easy-going, according to the bottle.  English pub-style would explain the hoppiness.  Easy-going is accurate.  It won't assault you with a lot of flavours.  And it is smooth.  I like it although it's a little too hoppy for me to love it.

That's it!

Tomorrow Soviet Russia review you!

Stoner Food Reviews (Rebaked!), Day 5

Bienvenue, spirits!

I am starving so Imma just dig in.

MAC AND CHEESE

This is No Name brand mac and cheese, the cheapest Kraft Dinner in all of the REAL. CANADIAN. SUPERSTORE.  So real, so Canadian, so super.  It was 59 cents and it looks beautiful, smells beautiful and I forget what the other senses are.  Look, smell, feel, taste, hear.  It sounds squishy when I mix it.  Unfortunately I had to heat this by microwave because I seshed a while and my food got cold because I was waiting to be high to eat it.  Heating it up again with a microwave is yet another sacred rule I am breaking, a cardinal sin to my know-it-all goody-two-shoes wine snob brother who believes in all this wine tasting bull that is based on nothing and has never improved the way things taste in any way ever!  That is SACRED RULE BREAKING #2… wine snobs had better leave right now because they should be expecting many more of these rule breakings.  Just letting you know.

Okay, now to actually taste the thing before it gets cold again.  Hmm…  kind of bland.  Cheesy but not prominently cheesy.  The texture and the temperature are really good; chewy and moist.  It's bland but I'm high enough that I like it and could probably eat the whole box if I was in an eat-the-whole box-binge-watch-30-Rock sort of mood.  I am just mindlessly eating this now and very confused.  Staring straight ahead and shovel, shovel, shovel, not even reading or watching anything.  Haha.  Kind of sweet and bready.  It does also taste artificial.  Can taste the butter as well.  This is definitely a nice attempt at mac and cheese for 59 cents.  I know what to subsist on if I become homeless.  I do have a sinking feeling that a sober tasting would be worse.

Next, I got a Mug Cake cookbook for my birthday so I will be making a mug cake today.  I will be making…

ROOT BEER FLOAT MUG GAKE

I am actually so pumped to make a bunch of mug cakes from this thing, fuck, maybe even one mug cake every day.  They even have mug cheesecake!  This is a recipe from 100 Mug Cakes by Leslie Bilderback.

Having this with whipped cream…  As I stab my fork into it, there is a spongey texture.  Smells eggy and blandly cakey.  Sweet.  Whipped cream and cake work nicely together.  Nothing immediately gross.  It's very tough to get a scoop.  So far, good but kind of bland, like the last food.  It's tolerable but nothing to write home about.  There's an eggy taste as well.  I do not taste the root beer at all haha.  Maybe I should have used the root beer extract.  The texture is firm and cooked but kind of tough.  I basically had to stab it with my spoon several times to get pieces off.  I declare this mug cake meh.  Not a good start to this cookbook, but I'm hopeful for the other recipes.

I think you can guess what I will be sampling next…

ROOT BEER

Boylan Root Beer, American company, I believe.  Yum, really strong flavour.  Sweet and sassy.  I like.  This would probably be good root beer float root beer.  Not much else to say.  It's quite nice.  I wish the mug cake had tasted like this. :(  Yeah the spice is nice and prominent.  This is probably one of the best root beers I've had.  Nom nom nom.  It tastes quite natural as well, not very artificial.  Although for all I know it's as unnatural as Mug Root Beer and I'm just fooled by the fact that it's in a glass bottle.  Who knows?

Later tonight we eat the dingo and your baby.

Stoner Food Reviews (Rebaked!), Day 4

Howdy poltergeists!

Listening to: The Weepies

Today I will review some Christmasy delights.  This may be a booze-soaked endeavour, fair warning.  And I am a sloppy drunk.

First!

EGG NOG WITH SCOTCH

Nice, nice, nice.  You can taste both very well.  It's a nice eggnog in which you can definitely taste the spices and you get bite and warmth from the scotch.  My wine-obsessed brother would call it blasphemy to imbibe an entire scotch before reviewing another liquid.  Ha!  He doesn't know what he's missing!  Very tasty is all I can say.  A nice winter buzz drink.  Probably wouldn't want to get drunk on this seeing as it has so much dairy but it's a nice day drinking kind of mixer in my opinion.  It's no Caucasian but at the very least it's an Oriental (racism is hilarious!)

CANDY CANE LANE TEA

Decided to play the Weepies' Christmas song "All that I want" for this so I feel all Christmassy right now!  This tea is great.  Can taste the mint, not too weak and it's nice and sweet and flavourful.  It's a good tea, what can I say?  And it's warming me up really well.  My mouth feels a bit of a cold feeling from this afterward.  Let's try a swish.  Eh, more mint, nothing new.  But it's warm and the mint is prominent and I like it and that's that, alright?  Leave it alone for God's sakes.

Okay bye.

Announcement!  The saddest song of the week is Stars by The Weepies (especially this particular music video for the song): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1pV9M7GYOKM

Next week we eat greek fire.

Stoner Food Reviews (Rebaked!), Day 3

Greetings ghosts!

Listening to: Death Cab for Cutie, Taylor Swift, The Weepies
Watching: 30 Rock
(Don't worry, this becomes important later.  Nah, just kidding.)

Today is feast day apparently.  I'm staying up late for this but it's worth it because I am having a stoner tea party for one!  Today's spread consists of 6 items; a chocolate crepe snack, strawberry wafers, macarons, super special crackers with swiss, cheddar and smoked cheddar, Johnnie Walker scotch and cinnamon-vanilla tea.  Nom nom nom is all I can say aboot that, eh?

First item I will eat is… hard to pick.  Okay, I think I'll go for the crackers.

CRACKERS WITH CHEESE

These are actually special, super thin crackers that I got from Loblaws (Savoury Crisps by 34 Degrees) with a cute spirally design that essentially stand back and let the filling speak for itself and offer a few little improvements.  I'm using cheddar, swiss and smoked cheddar inside the crackers, very thinly sliced in cracker sandwich format.



Cheddar:

Mmmm, great chewy texture, the cheddar is just so nicely emphasized yet shrouded a bit by the cracker.  I love how thin they are. Super tasty and a cute, pleasant-to-feel-in-your-mouth snack.  Does that mean it has mouth feel?  Fuck if I know.

Smoked cheddar:

Taste the smoke right away.  It seems quite emphasized and perhaps also coloured by the cracker.  Tastes like a roaring fireplace in the dead of winter. The texture of the smoked cheddar works really well with the thin, malleable, chewy cracker.  Bam! is all I can say.

Swiss:

Mmm… So good.  Swiss is so much lighter than the forceful smoked cheddar.  To me, it tastes like stinky feet, but like a delicious stinky feet that you would eat.  Yep, all of these cheeses taste phenomenal with these crackers.  Can't get over how nice the texture of the cracker and cheese feels it my mouth.  These crackers are truly a pleasure to eat.  Sad that that's over, although that does mean I'm onto my fucking 3-course dessert because why not diabetes, right?

MACARONS

Got these from my local grocery store bakery.  I love these so I'm guessing I will enjoy this.  3 flavours, which will be announced as I go.  Also, that is what they were labeled as but the labels could be wrong.

Blueberry:

Ultra amazing great!  Texture hits me right away, super soft and easy to bite into.  Definitely blueberry. Sugary, but that works for this dessert.  Very flavourful as well.

Pistachio:

Yup, definitely pistachio.  They nailed the flavour.  Absolutely delicious.  Nice and creamy and sweet.  My god these things are wonderful.

Either Pumpkin Spice or Creamsicle (both of those were orange):

It's a gamble.  If it's Pumpkin Spice my crush likes me and if it's Creamsicle he doesn't.  PUMPKIN SPICE!  Oh wow, they did a good job.  That is a perfect Halloween treat.  Creamy again, the spices are there but not overpowering.  Really good.

STRAWBERRY WAFERS

Yup, those taste both good and of strawberry.  Great texture; that's half the reason you buy them right there.  Although, they do have a bit of an artificial flavour, definitely overly sweet as well.  They aren't as good as the other treats.

CHOCOLATE CREPE SNACK

Mmm… I warmed it up.  Chocolatey, definitely tastes like crepe (pun not at all intended).  The chocolate tastes very dark and rich.  I personally would prefer more of a milk chocolate but it's good for what it is.  I'm cold and the warmth of it is definitely making me feel cozy.  Not too sweet.  It's good, but not amazing.

SCOTCH

Bottoms up.  The sweet stuff from before definitely makes this taste sweet.  I wonder what kind of pairings I could do with this.  Very interesting flavour.  Tastes way better high than sober for some reason.  I think it tastes too gasoline-ish and bitter sober but high and after some sweets it tastes sweet and pleasant.  It really warms me up inside - very toasty flavour.  Oh, swishing it in my mouth is a recipe for burning of the mouth and bitter, gasoline taste.  Yeah, I think I'll just sip without swishing.  Well, one more swish just to make sure I didn't miss anything noteworthy beyond gasoline taste.  Nah.  Not a big fan of this scotch.  I hope that isn't blasphemy in the scotch circles.  I'm sure they consider me a troglodyte anyway so whatever.

CINNAMON-VANILLA TEA

Can't have a tea party without tea!  It's herbal!  It tastes kind of weird.  I can pick up the cinnamon.  Kind of a strange subtle cinnamon taste.  Can taste the vanilla only slightly.  It's mostly just watery.  Not a huge fan of this.  I steeped it a while so the weak flavour is not my fault.  Yeah, this tea is meh.

So… 2 were amazing, 2 were okay and 2 were bad or meh.  A full gamut of quality.  Honestly I thought I'd love all of it so that's surprising.  Ta-ta for now!

Next week we eat yellow snow and the little known orange snow.  

Stoner Food Reviews (Rebaked!), Day 2

Good afternoon, spectres!

Today I am waking and baking because I was actually too high to review last night.  As a stoner, I have a responsibility to drop the ball immediately upon doing any sort of daily regimen, yes, even eating.  So today I am doing two reviews.  Wake and bake and then evening delight.  As an added bonus I am going to go to work high (don't worry, I'm not driving, like a stoner would have a car!  Ha!)  Listening to Ed Sheeran today because that's relevant.

Okay, so our first dish is a dal makhani curry by Gits instant curries served with some succulent basmati rice.  I am dying of hunger.  It was extremely treacherous not actually eating the curry before writing.  Agh.  Okay so I'm going to eat now.

DAL MAKHANI

Yes, yes, delicious.  Nice and hearty, kind of almost has a beefy taste, the lentils in this.  Apart from Paneer Makhani and Chana Masala, this is one of my favourite curry dishes and Gits does a good job.  I think I added a hint too much rice to mine, but that was my mistake, not anyone else's!  Not being accusatory.  Yes, quite nice with the rice.  I had a thought, but I forgot.  Can taste the spiciness as well but it's pretty mild, which is good because I can't take things that are too spicy.  This curry is so creamy, it's just so good with a nice bed of rice.  I keep rhyming nice and rice.  I like that this one has both the lentils and some kidney beans because the beans really give it a nice beefy protein.  It is just a good curry.  Like a nice, proteiny, hearty hug that isn't going to kill you as much as other food that are hugs, you know, comfort food, filling and delicious and comforting somehow.  Make you feel full and fluffy and nice.  That's 90% of what I eat which probably explains my quite visible weight problem.  Aren't I fat?  Ha, you have no idea.

Next up, I guess I have time for an ice cream sandwich!

ICE CREAM SANDWICH

I believe these things are by selection.  Mmmm delicious, sweet, chewy soft texture.  Soo good.  Very tiny things.  Gone before you realized you wanted one.  Nah.  I am forced to savour today.  They make the cookies of these ones very soft and chocolatey.  Did a very good job.  Selection brand can be hit and miss.  It's just a very well done typical ice cream sandwich, nothing fancy.  I like.

Okay bye for now.

Next time we eat corn!  And this time it will be different, Steve!

Stoner Food Reviews (Rebaked!), Day 1

Hello bitches who actually read this!  (Aka no one)  I am back at it again!

Last time: http://hermitthefrogblog.blogspot.ca/2014/02/reviewing-foods-while-stoned.html

I am doing stoner food reviews for… reasons I guess.  I don't even know why really, I guess I just feel like stuffing my face for some somewhat, slightly more legitimate reason than hunger.  I may do a week, a few weeks or a month like my last attempt at this.  I'll play it by ear.  So, without further ado, I will now 420 blaze it faggot.

…

(Listen to this while you're "waiting") https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTpWq7rlpIY

…

(Or this) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eMK4cfXj5c0

…


Hey it's high me.  I don't know if it's just that warm and fuzzy feeling I'm getting but I trust you guys.  I love you guys, whether you're scrolling through here to find some specific thing that I can't offer you, laughing at the horrible quality, here completely by accident and shortly leaving or someone who really really wants to see every search result about a "hedonistic hermit" because perhaps it's a lifestyle that they want to learn more about.  All the same, you guys are so wonderful and truly the light of my life.  So I'm going to tell you my name.  I am Valerie Heston.  This is my photo:

Ha!  How did you fall for that?  That was a stock photo that I got my picking the fifth result after I googled "woman stock photo."  You need to work on your critical thinking.  Not my name either… or is it?

Anyway, for my first food item, I will be reviewing (yes, I'm high, but I'm not a moron, I can still think and write properly)…

RASPBERRIES!!!  

My all time favourite fruit and one of my favourite foods.  I am starving so I will dig in.  I place the bowl in front of me and it makes the most wonderful knock on the wood.  My body almost sighs with relief.  A bit bitter right now but they are still refreshing and tasty and they have such a lovely texture.  Yeah, for some reason they taste very bitter, okay not very bitter but bitter.  Maybe it has something to do with smoking?  Guess I'll just keep eating.  I think they are getting less bitter.  Still good, all the same.

POUTINE WRAP

Next up, continuing and ending the Canadian theme is poutine, in a wrap.  Yes.  Poutine can be improved upon.  Do you ever think every famous director has a secret cult and they put all kinds of vague symbolism in their movies that teach subtle lessons relating to their cult and these movies are watched over and over again within this cult and movie scenes are quoted like bible passages?  No?  Just me?  This poutine wrap is made with a store-brand tortilla, Cavendish frozen fries, Double Gloucester cheese, cheddar cheese (no cheese curds because fuck you, that's why) and some canned St. Hubert brown gravy.  It's going to be aces and unfortunately you can only eat it vicariously through me. :D 

Oh making it was lots of fun but taking the picture, agony, with the anticipation of waiting to eat it.  Massive munchies right now.  I'll try a fry first.  Fucking good.  Mmmm, potato and just enough salt and crispiness.  One more.  Yeah I got good fries and gravy.  Fries are a bit burnt, but worth it just to eat the good ones.  Wrap time.  Hmmm a bit weird with the Double Gloucester but nice otherwise.  Somehow the gravy is more bitter with the cheese.  Maybe I added too much gravy, it's an exact science getting the proportion right.  Really wonderful texture.  Not too messy either, a bonus.  The wrap really compliments the poutine.  It's white flour so obviously it's an amazing-tasting burrito.  White power, right?  I take back the thing about it not being messy.  And you don't want it messy - it'll look like you were doing scat/bukkake fusion porn.  Maybe I'm making a mess because I'm high.  Yeah, not even too bitter, just too salty.  

What if someone proposed to me by putting a ring inside the cap of a beer bottle?  Fuck yeah.  That's the most romantic thing in the world.  That or proposing with a box of weed that looks like a jewelry box.  Any guy that does that is a keeper.  

I'm getting so tired.  It's almost 4:30 am.  Shouldn't have stayed up this late.  Alas.

BEER

The last item is a Scottish beer made with an ancient recipe apparently.  It's called Grozet and it's a Gooseberry Ale by Williams Brothers Brewing Co.  

Very unique.  Bitter berry flavour so far.  Kind of reminds me of blackberries because they are bitter berries.  Some little hints of sweetness to it.  It's definitely drinkable.  I don't think I've ever tried gooseberries and they don't sound very appetizing, but this beer is not only quite tasty and well-balanced but it also tastes like berries, possibly gooseberries so already it is way better than actual gooseberries by a long shot.  After this I'm going to be absolutely ready for bed.  Can't even really describe the flavour.  Maybe a little earthy?  There's a bit of spiciness to it.  It does help to do that thing that you do with wine, where you swish the sip around your mouth.  It's like your tongue put on a pair of glasses.  I thought maybe I tasted a note of vanilla and banana.  Picking up a lot of things!  Or maybe that's just the gooseberry flavour.  It's good though, I enjoy it.  

Next time we eat porn.

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 31

Listening to: Bob Marley.  Doy.  Also, Kings of Leon and Indie88 (radio station).

Hi everyone.  So, this is the last day.  As I said earlier, I'm going to do a reflection today.  The final dinner at the stoner table is... *drumroll please* ... doughnuts and a Corona! *licks lips and looks lovingly at luscious donuts*

Selection Assorted Mini Donuts (there are three types):

Frosted: Amaazing.  So so sweet and cakey.  I think I'm going to be eating these with a fork because they are messy!  There is almost something lemony in the aftertaste.  It's so sugary, and yet it still isn't too sugary.  The only thing I can think of to say is it's wonderful.  And it's cool as the other side of a pillow.  Oh God is this going to be one of those days where I get even more than what was on my plate afterwards because even though it would be really filling sober, you could eat so much of that thing anyway?

Chocolate:  I keep wanting to eat the cinnamon next because it looks amazing!  Ok, self control...  Save the best for last...  Kind of cakey, actually.  No, the chocolate overpowers that flavour.  These aren't any better high.  I guess they'll always be my least favourite flavour; the chocolate ones.  I bet they would be better if they could use a chocolate powder, instead of a chocolate liquid coating.  All the same, there is something about them that radiates because of my mental state.

Cinnamon: Oh, so excited.  Flavour just gushes into my mouth.  The cinnamon is stronger than I expected, but not too strong.  It has a lot of the beautiful sweetness of the frosted ones.  I can feel my teeth rotting...  The cinnamon, the cake, the sugar... they blend so perfectly.  My sensitive teeth are getting uncomfortable, but I really want one or two more.  Oh my God it's so good.  These are perfect donuts; not too big, not too weird of a taste to them.  They should call them Two-Bite Donuts, because you can eat them in a couple bites.  I want another, but then again I also don't want a heart attack... and heart attack wins out in that scenario.  Sorry, tongue.  Better luck next time I'm eating some carbohydrates!  Those donuts were great.  My stomach echoes me with a satisfying burp.

Corona: Bitter, cool, tastes a bit sweet because I just ate the donuts.  My tongue is tickled by the fizz.  I can also taste the delicious yeast, but it's more subtle.  The hops are strong in this one.  Not too strong.  As beer goes, I like it.  It's making me sway side to side in bliss.  I can taste a hint of apples.  I think this would be a great summer drink, or maybe an autumn drink.  Not the greatest in the winter.  A good whiskey or Bailey's is good, but not cold beer...  Not much to say.  It's beer, it's cool, it gets the job done and makes you so relaxed...

Reflection

What did I learn from this little experiment/series?  Was it fun?  Was it challenging?  

I learned a lot from this.  Well, not a huge, profound realization or something like that, but a few little things.  

1. I am not an experienced food reviewer by any means.  I review lots of movies, books, concerts, movies in my free time, but not food so much.  I don't know if I learned any new terminology or methods but I definitely got some experience reviewing food and learned how to describe food with words other than "great" or "awesome," but it was challenging to think of things to say about the food at times.

2. I got to see old foods in a new light.  Whether it was something that I liked tasting better, something I loved tasting worse, something I always thought was "meh" tasting like a dream come true, I think the high changes the flavour of foods sometimes, for better or for worse (usually better).  I also think spiciness is amplified when you are high.

3. I learned to appreciate food more.  Much of the food I ate for this challenge I ate without TV, a book, someone to talk to, etc.  I was usually just listening to music or it was just me, the food and the keyboard.  It was weird because most of the food that I eat, I will eat it while distracting or entertaining myself in some way.  For this challenge my food had my full attention and it was different, but good.  I was focusing on the flavours and appreciating the meal on it's own.  I think I might try that sober more often.  Eating food and just thinking about the flavour, needing no other entertainment.  Thinking about how lucky I am to have this three times a day or more.  And good quality most of the time.  Then again, I still prefer watching something or reading something while eating.  It's just so much more entertaining, however good the food is.  So maybe I'll just appreciate the food on it's own when I'm high and everything is entertaining.  

4. I learned to do something consistently.  Put out something every day, flexing my writing muscles daily.  That was really good.  It was nice seeing the posts stack up day after day, when usually they'd crawl for months.  Most bloggers post a lot more often than I do, so it was good to try to blog more regularly.  

5. I tried some new foods!

6.  I worked on my photography.  I 'm not a very experienced photographer, but I think this increased my experience.  I found myself playing with light, angles, presentation, background, etc over the course of the month as my photographer dad gave me advice on my photos occasionally.

7. I learned that, for the most part, flavour-wise, weed just makes food taste better.  Or it helps you notice the flavour of food that was already really good.  Thinking about my past responses, most of my reviews involved the phrase "Mmmm..." and the overwhelming majority of the reviews were positive.  However, I usually went for foods that I like or foods I thought I would like.  I think it would be interesting for me to do another series with foods that I both like and dislike and see how weed changes the way I perceive them.  Perhaps another time.  

Despite all the benefits, there is also the fact that most of what I ate was unhealthy and on many cases I ate too much of it in one sitting, due to my low self-control when I have the munchies.  I have been noticing more heartburn this week and I gained about ten pounds during this experiment.  Yeah, yikes.  Tomorrow I'm going to start working hard to go to sleep right after getting high, because, otherwise, TEMPTATION.  Even right now, one of the Cinnamon Donuts is calling to me.  Stop it, you fiend!  So, I'm looking forward to not being so unhealthy, and getting to bed earlier.

Was it fun?  Yes, definitely.  Was it challenging?  Occasionally, when cooking food or taking photos high.  I usually tried to cook them sober, but when they were done high, sometimes I would screw up the timing with my low self-control, like eating some of a dish before I could photograph it.  

Well, thanks for reading and that is the end of the Stoner Food Reviews.  Perhaps I will do another that is only local restaurants that I walk to or one where I cook through a classic cookbook and sample each recipe high.  I'm not sure, but for now, goodbye!

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 30

Listening to: Indie Rock Station

Well good morning to everyone.  I decided to do some restaurant food today.  I went to Bombay Grill and bought takeout!  It's from a local indian take-out place called Silver Spoon.  The smell is intoxicating.

Chana Masala with Biryani Rice (I've already reviewed the rice in a previous entry): It's very hot... and spicy.  But good.  Mmm... buttery.  I don't remember it being this spicy.  The flavour is lovely.  The chick peas taste nice and meaty.  Sometimes the spice overpowers the flavours, but sometimes the spice is milder and the flavours stand out more.  It's so juicy.  I love the texture of the rice and the chewy chick peas.  Good thing I have a big glass of water.  I wish this was milder.  I don't know if I can finish this.  I'm getting full.  It's really good though.  I guess I'll move onto the chocolate and come back to it later...

Cadbury Dairy Milk (Chips Ahoy! Cookie Dough flavour): This was amazing sober, so I think I'm in for a treat.  There are cute little pockets of cookie dough in here.  The dough tastes like the cookie, but a bit better, flavour-wise.  This is really good.  I'm taking big bites now.  The chocolate just wraps around the cookie dough perfectly.  If I could improve this chocolate bar, I would more cookie dough to the recipe.  It's a bit too subtle.

That was a great dinner.  Very nice.  Have a lovely morning, everyone, especially the night hawks going to bed right now!

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 28

Listening to: Indie Rock Station and Hard Rock/Classic Rock Station

Hi gals and guys!  I'm back... from my sobriety!  It was so warm today!  I hope spring is coming!  There's still snow, but I have hope.  At least some warmer days?

Homemade Classic White Bread (from a Betty Crocker cookbook): Yummy and yeasty, very chewy, the crust has a nice crunchiness, also a little bit sweet; just enough.  Not too much.  The golden crust has a sharp, strong flavour.  Mmmm... this is damn good.  :D  This bread is the perfect texture; chewy, malleable...  I could eat so much of this bread.  I think I'll have some more...  Man, my reviews are ALWAYS so glowing.  This is nothing like store bread.  You couldn't buy this in a store.  It's very hard to stop eating these, but I must stop eating them now.

Chocolate Chip Cookie from Country Style (won it from a coffee cup there): Wow, the chocolate is so strong.  Can't tell whether it's homemade or one of those freeze-dried things.  Getting full now.  Mmmm...  The non-chocolate flavour is tasty too!  I highly recommend trying this high.  Man, when I ate these sober a while ago they were unremarkable, but they are amazing high.  My tongue wants more delicious flavours, but my stomach wants me to stop.  I'll go with my stomach... but not my liver.  ;)

Sorry again!

Out of product again due to poor planning!  I will hopefully post tomorrow but if not, I will definitely return in the next few days.

Stay smoky, my friends, and remember to take 'er easy.

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 27

Listening to: Playlist; The Whites Stripes, Blind Guardian, Sweeney Todd soundtrack, Muse, Indie Rock Station

Heylo.  Felt kind of lonely and sad after work today, but now I feel a lot better and, knowing that food and booze (and Breaking Bad) is coming, ecstatic!  So, that's sorted.  I know how to spoil myself.  :P

My Grandma's hot chocolate mix (Probably the best stocking stuffer I have ever received.  Actually second place, after the amazing beer bread mix she gave us...): The cocoa powder is a bit overpowering.  The whipped cream adds sweetness and foaminess.  The marshmallows in it are a bit annoying.  I wonder if Grandma (who is a bit anti-vegetarian) purposefully put it in the mix, knowing that I am vegetarian and it contains gelatin.  I've decided to drink the mix anyway because I need to use it up and gelatin isn't as bad as meat because it is more of byproduct than the actual product and it's harder to abstain from because it's in literally all candy.  The flavour is richer and sweeter at the bottom, where all the marshmallows have crowded together.  I think the marshmallows dominate the flavour too much.  The marshmallows at the bottom actually taste pretty good, but I won't eat the dregs with a spoon.  That's enough senseless pig's skin and bones-eating for today, thanks.  I hope I don't sound too condescending towards meat-eaters.  I don't mean to come across that way, but it's harder to tell what my writing tone is when I'm high.  I respect everyone's diet, even if I disagree with it.

Crispy Minis (Buttered Popcorn flavour): Mmmmm....  I love the flavour and texture of this.  Certain rice cakes have more flavour than others and when you eat those you can really taste the butter flavour.  They occasionally have a tang of sweetness to them.  They're so good I'm eating the little chunks at the bottom of the bowl, and very messily, I might add.

Grand Marnier: Highly complex and interesting flavour.  It's sweet and sends warmth up my nose.  It tastes like candy, cherries, syrup and alcohol.  Unlike rum or vodka or tequila, it's sweetness overpowers the bitterness of alcohol so it tastes delicious and it still has the same alcoholic content as more bitter hard liquors.  Perfect.  Very tasty.

Goodnight, people!  Tomorrow, I'm sure I will have another equally delicious set of dishes to consume for your vicarious pleasure.

Next time: we eat all the parents who have sex loud enough for the kids to hear it.  *shudders*

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 26

Listening to: Playlist; Stevie Wonder, Rush, Bob Marley, The Postal Service

Hello stoners, investigators and readers of the world!  Today, I bring you some of the most delectable foods I've been able to get my hands on and sample in my years on this earth.  

Kraft Dinner Original: Still a bit lukewarm because it's microwaved, not fresh.  The flavours turns off and on; flavourless and then filled with flavour.  Not quite as good microwaved and high as fresh and sober.  I guess microwaving just saps some of the flavour out of it.  It tastes the way Kraft Dinner usually tastes to me sober; cheesy, buttery, rich, deliciously junky-tasty, but a less defined version of those tastes.

Ritter Sport Praline: Lovely.  So smooth and milky.  The hazelnut flavour is sweet and strong.  This is definitely the best flavour of Ritter Sport.  This is filling even when I'm high.  Not much to say about this because I have no complaints.

Next time! We ayte aypples and banaynays.

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 25

Listening to: Kings of Leon

Hello there, folks.  I've decided that on the 31st day (marking a month) of my stoner food review month, I'll do a little reflection on how I felt about this challenge and what I learned and discovered.  Today, I have a massive thing to eat.  See for yourselves...  All I can say is that this tastes amazing.  The naan tastes nice and baked and the curry is spicy, earthy, meaty.

Gits Ready Meals Chana Masala (Indian curry) with naan bread: Very yummy.  Slight aftertaste of celery.  It's like dipping bread in a delicious bean soup.  Mmm... the chickpeas really boost the flavour.  I cooked the naan a lot longer than I usually do, and it's almost as crunchy as a cracker now.  Still great-tasting.  Can't stop eating to write something!  All I can say is that this tastes amazing.  The naan tastes nice and baked while the curry tastes earthy, spicy, meaty, maybe a bit nutty as well.  It definitely isn't too spicy for me.  That was awesome.  Weirdly enough I'm still hungry.  Guess I'll have something else.

Crispy Minis (Caramel Kettle Corn flavour): Yay dessert!  These are basically little rice cakes with really tasty flavours.  Very sweet and caramelly!  Interesting texture, kind of bumpy and crisp.  These are so good.  They do also have that sweet and salty kettle corn taste, but it's subtle.  Nom nom nom.  I could eat another bowl if I wanted to but I think that's enough for today.

Next time!  Phish and Meat Loaf.

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 24

Listening to: Silversun Pickups

Hello again.  I only had two hours sleep and I've been up for 13 hours, so I barely made it to my post here today, in my zombie-like state.  I'm here now, though, with an enchanting assortment of treats to enjoy.  Okay, just two things, but oh well.  What's weird today is that I've been feeling crappy all day due to fatigue and a hangover, but right now I feel awesome.  Just relaxed, but not weighed down with tiredness.  Maybe getting stoned actually helps you stay up later because you can focus better and feel more mellow, yet energized.

Barbecue Chips: Smokey.  Sweet, yet savoury.  Also, kind of salty and spicy.  Sucking on them is fun, because you can leach out the flavour of the chip.  Lays are also like that.  Well, pretty much any greasy type of chip.  These are really tasty and addictive.

Irresistibles Pecan Clusters: Just looking at them I'm excited.  Pecans perfectly encased in well-crafted chocolate on a pure white china plate.  They kind of look like big brown buttons.  Mmm... I taste caramel.  They're very chewy, verging on the texture of taffy.  Nutty and chocolatey; this tastes fantastic.  They taste a little bit like toffee as well.  Those were good.  

Next time we eat the meaning of life so no one will ever find out.

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 23

Listening to: Indie Rock Station (Not The Edge, starting to really hate that station)

Hello there.  Did you know I've gained eight pounds since I began this project?  Yup.  Crazy.  It could have have something to do with indulging Munchies me each night, maybe.  Today it was slim pickings for food because dad hadn't bought groceries in a while, and neither have I, so there we go...  I managed to scrounge up something tasty, though...

President's Choice The Decadent Chocolate Chip Cookie Flavour Hot Chocolate: Mmm... Tastes like cookies and chocolate.  Kind of lukewarm.  Tastier than I remember.  I can taste the hot milk as well.  Honestly, I want to get this over with because I am looking forward to the next thing!  Very chocolatey and rich at the bottom, with punches of pure sugar.

The best porridge I have ever made (I've gone bonkers today) with oatmeal, cinnamon sugar, milk, maple syrup and honey): Mmm... flavourful.  Tastes a bit like cinnamon pastry mixed with macaroons.  The cinnamon flavour is strong but not overpowering.  This is very good, considering the fact that it was a second or last resort.  It's so wholesome and old-timey-tasting, and yet, there's sooooo much sugar...  I love that.  

Wow, Breaking Bad is amazing high.  I was watching a scene in season one, episode two and I kept saying "oh shit!" over and over, in surprise.  

Next time!  We eat balut.

Stoner Food Reviews, Day 22

Listening to: Muse, MGMT

Okay, let's take some pictures, shall we?

Today I'm watching Mad Men because I can't think of anything else to watch on Netflix.  This is my first time watching it so I don't know if I'll like it.  If I don't, I'll watch Breaking Bad.  

Time to eat... *rubs hands expectantly*  My snack is quite junky and sugary today.

Crispy Crunch: Mmmmmm... chocolately and sweet, with a centre that tastes like Peanut Brittle.  Oh wow, this is good.  It's an explosion of confectionary flavour.  Oh dear, if you have peanut allergies you can't eat this probably.  What a sad thought.  Must have more candy!  I am salivating.  I could eat so many of these...  Mmmmm...  Unfortunately I only have one bar.  But, the next food might be a consolation as it is also sweet and delicious...

Skittles (Darkside): Mmmmm.... Lime.  Reminds me of a Slushie.  I haven't had Skittles in a while.  They're so flavourful, even if the flavour is artificial.  Still tastes good.  :)  Cherry next and orange.  I must have eaten oranges and reds together.  Another green.  Yum.  Grape, but tastes too sugary to be accurate.  Red and green.  Tastes kind of pomegranate-limey.  Blue.  Can't taste what it is.  The legend says forbidden fruit.  Mysterious.  I think I like green the best.  Also, these taste a bit like a solid version of Kool-Aid.  Oh, there are two shades of red; fruit punch and pomegranate.  Purple and blue is a nice combo.  Grapey and fruity and oh so sweet.  Purple and green are also good together.  In short, very yummy candy.  These are really good for a sugar fix.  I hope I can sleep okay today.

Mike's Hard Lemonade: Mmmm.... Still cool.  Tastes so clean, lemony, fizzy.  Along with yesterday's cider, this drink also reminds me of champagne.  The texture of the bottle feels like a lemon.  I think that's what they had in mind.  This has amazing flavour for something with alcohol.  I tried spiking a Brisk Lemonade with vodka (the same liquor used in what I'm drinking right now).  It's making me drift off a bit.  Yeah, I can only taste the vodka ever so slightly.  And yet I'm clearly getting tipsy.  That was good.

Well, goodnight.  Hope everyone has a great day and hopefully some time to chill out, relax and wind down.  Hopefully it will also be a mind-altering time.  Again, this is your host, Hedonistic Hermit, and I will see you tomorrow!

Next time!  We eat nothing.